Faster Than a Speeding Bullet

Superman has nothing on my little man.

* Monday night, Jericho managed to get outside without being caught. He was only alone as his dad headed upstairs and I headed downstairs. We even crossed paths ON the stairs. Total unattended time: less than 10 seconds.

* December - Jericho manages to get into the fridge, pull out a pitcher of grape juice and pour it onto my carpet and off white couch while I'm going to the bathroom. Total time left unattended: less than 2 minutes.

* January - Jericho drinks nearly half of a bottle of Benadryl while I'm on the phone. He then asks for more. Total time left unattended: about 90 seconds.

* February - Jericho pushes a chair up to the kitchen counter, climbs up on it and gets his own snack out of the cupboard while I'm following him in from the next room. Total time left unattended: about 3 seconds.

* Still February - Jericho grabs a broken coffee cup handle and slices his little hand open. Total time left unattended: He wasn't. I was right there and STILL didn't see him do it.

* Gotta love February - I come home for Joel to inform me that Jericho "might have drank some cough syrup", but that he's "not sure how much". Jericho, meanwhile is fast alseep in the middle of the living room floor. Maybe a little, Joel. Total time left unattended: who knows.

* March - Jericho gets upstairs without being noticed, gets in to my make-up and applies eyeliner... to his cheeks. Luckily he was more Twisted Sister than RuPaul. Total time left unattended: Probably about 3 minutes.

Please note that these little mishaps are in addition to the daily "how did you manage to" and "are you freaking serious"-es that he gets.